Good Night, Tim

By: Jason Colthorp
By: Jason Colthorp

Another Dean story and other random useless musings.

The other night as we signed off, Andy, Tim and I were laughing about the last story.  Andy launches into a joke related to the topic and Tim immediately gets up and leaves.  His joke was aimed at both of us, but by the time Tim hit the studio door, it was all mine.  It wasn't terribly funny, but at least I stayed to listen once he started it.  Tim, though is notorious for that.  I was once accused of walking away during a conversation (which I've mentioned here and thoroughly disagree with).  No one with any kind of couth or not fighting a bladder problem just walks away in mid-talk.  But you should do it as a joke to someone-- it's hilarious.  I did it to the guy I was accused of walking away from in the first place-- Nick LaFave.  I stood up and asked him a hockey question, knowing he's bounce right up and start yapping.  I gave him 12 seconds and turned and walked away... busting a gut all the way around the corner.



The Coke Zero commercials are funny.  You know, the ones with the two Coke execs trying to sue Coke Zero for taste infringement.  Yeah, I like them and hate them all at once.  It's weird, the actual guts of them are good and funny then that quick sign-off-- "DA-DA-DA-DA-DAAAAH!"  So close to perfection.



I was very sad to see George Kell died.  What memories of Tiger baseball I have from George and Al!  I don't think I ever missed a Tiger game that was on regular TV growing up.  It was one of the highlights of summer for me.  I loved everything from the Tiger logo that growled and grabbed a bat and chewed it up to George Kell and Al Kaline talking about the game.  I actually met George at a Midwest League All-Star game at Olds Park in 1999.  He was very kind and let me record a sounder for the radio station I was working for.  I also remember in the early-90's when the Tigers were awful, they had a game where they strung together like 6 straight hits in an inning.  I was watching the highlights on ESPN when Dan Patrick paused for the game audio of every hit cut one after another.  It was a barrage of classic George Kell: "And a base hit... and a base hit... and ANOTHER base hit... and ANOTHER base hit!"  If you knew George, you can hear just how that sounded in your head.  It's almost as good as his best line ever: "AND THEY'RE GONNA WAVE HIM IN!"

So long, George.


Speaking of sports, I was watching the replay of the '79 NCAA Finals and couldn't help but wonder if Magic Johnson's comeback was the worst of all time.  That's saying a lot considering Michael Jordan's second comeback was pretty pathetic.  Bjorn Borg came back 10 years after hanging it up and didn't win a match.  Players like Brett Favre, Mario Lemieux and Roger Clemens look downright awesome compared to those.  Of course, Lemieux really was good still and Clemens was probably on the juice.  Boxers usually are the worst-- Sugar Ray Leonard, Evander Holyfield and of course, Muhammad Ali.  This argument is really between Ali and Magic.  Ali came back and got pummeled by the likes of Leon Spinks, Larry Holmes and Trevor Berbick with disastrous health effects.  That was tragic, Magic's was just sad.  After retiring due to HIV in 1991, he came back to play but was met with the idiotic fear of Karl Malone and other players and retired again.  He then came back as a coach in the middle of the 1993-94 season, but quit after 6 straight losses.  In that stint he also got in the middle of an altercation with Nick Van Exel and a referee.  Afterward he lectured Van Exel on how to play the game the right way and how you never touch an official, etc, etc.  The next year he returned at age 36 and played the last 32 games of the season with the Lakers. 


It would have been longer, but Magic was suspended for bumping an official after a call he didn't like.  Something I didn't know about that comeback, though-- Magic averaged 15 points, 7 assists, 6 rebounds with his extra-large frame.  Given that, I'll call Ali's comeback the worst of all time. 


What's with the radio commercials for Medical Weight Loss?  "Hi, I'm Nicki Lewis and I lost 18 pounds with Medical Weight Loss!"

How do I know that.  It's radio.  You could be the size of a house for all I know.

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